| o myspace |
[Saturday,
June 4th, 2005] |
Thursday, February 24, 2005
o hear.(d again)
Current mood: hearted
o hear
this wasn't fair to a real amazing girl so this has been edited
its been a while
since i've looked through this pile
you know the one
with love, the one done
don't you remember
all those friends with comfort from my slaughter
no this is with the so impossible
the one i think of day and nite as the unreachable
with the dreamer's dream of the hollywood kiss
with the boy outside her house hoping for his miss
"don't build your world around
volcanoes will melt you down."
i am of real boy to make you a memorable story
one of love with a glory
one to remember as your cane gives you trouble
a story when told, it makes you smile and mumble
"i can't take my eyes off of you"
"i can't take my eyes off of you"
you blush you flooring sight
how I shy, nervous, wanting to impress this night
i'm scared of what this written might make a girl see make you see
the boy i want, am, pretend, love to be
i am o so uncertain of your heart
o how i dream, dream dream it's one with me with a part
jump flailing arms with innocent smiles gracing you
hopefull smirk to make your face shining at me oooooooooo
grasping your hands raising to the sky
with a sweet sexy killing flooring lovely look in your eye
wrapping your neck with my oh so cold hands
kissing your o so soft lips and making me a man
and ending it with a remembered day
one not left past away
but one kept as a loved memory
o dear. ..... . o how i wish
she's a woman
9:20 PM - 9 Comments - 10 Kudos - Add Comment - Edit - Remove
Aubree Edge Loves Kick Ass Camie XBRTX
niiiiice
Posted by Aubree Edge Loves Kick Ass Camie XBRTX on Thursday, February 24, 2005 at 11:16 PM
[Remove] [Reply to this]
||: VICTORIAsSecret :||
did you write this yourself?? it's reallly good...strong emotions :)
Posted by ||: VICTORIAsSecret :|| on Friday, February 25, 2005 at 12:37 AM
[Remove] [Reply to this]
aly
its beautiful.....tear...tear...........seriously, its really good
Posted by aly on Friday, February 25, 2005 at 4:17 PM
[Remove] [Reply to this]
lulu
oh hun, this was beautiful, she would have to be a fool to not want to be with you after reading this, and by the way, i love damien rice, that was truly beautiful <3
Posted by lulu on Sunday, February 27, 2005 at 9:46 PM
[Remove] [Reply to this]
...did i do that?...
hmm very nice, u wrote it urself? *impressed*
Posted by ...did i do that?... on Tuesday, March 01, 2005 at 2:50 PM
[Remove] [Reply to this]
karen
WHOOP WHOOP I KNOW WHY YOU WROTE THIS..I'M A MOTHA EFFIN G...bye love you...smiles.
Posted by karen on Thursday, March 10, 2005 at 8:45 PM
[Remove] [Reply to this]
karen
i miss you and that night was awesome but i really wish i stayed longer.
Posted by karen on Tuesday, April 19, 2005 at 10:06 PM
[Remove] [Reply to this]
|
|
| you're not sam from garden state |
[Monday,
December 27th, 2004] |
| [ |
mood |
| |
 blank |
] |
| [ |
music |
| |
blood bros- cecelia(spell) |
] |
i thought you'd do an original moment when you feel unoriginal. you're the most un original. you're like every other girl. i thought you'd be the most original.. i hate that i'm wrong. i wish you were the girl i wished.
|
|
| im done |
[Friday,
December 24th, 2004] |
| [ |
music |
| |
ex's and oh's |
] |
i guess im done.
|
|
| we could leave or forget it all together |
[Thursday,
December 23rd, 2004] |
| [ |
music |
| |
last christmas- jimmy eat world |
] |
the months dont matter its the days i can't take. i misssss her. it's over. merry christmas i will tell her. as if we forgot. do i ask her to say, "i dont care"?
|
|
| poetic lie sense |
[Tuesday,
December 21st, 2004] |
| [ |
music |
| |
blood bros- cecelia(spell) |
] |
poetic lie sense
on my departure, my response.
oh no. she's been hurt. she's going thru it now. i think i'm over her. i'm really
gullable. ask any girl i know. i walk the walk, i talk the talk. hear it is.
how is it my dear?
oh no, thats sad to hear
wait, you're not asking how i do today
its fine, don't worry, "i'm not okay"
oh no, still don't know what to respond
here's a thought, why don't you ask how come?
oh but no, you can't hear
why are you like this, is it fear?
oh no, another rhyme for this poem
la la la la la la la
hey, i think you're really nice
oh no, i said it but you're really pretty
i'm not every other boy
i am forgiving.
i keep a smile when my face is in shy
i keep a hug when i'm all smiles inside
i am feckless when it comes to love
i am wreckless when it comes to her.
on and on and on and on
i tremble as my fingers lay this keyboard.
they don't need to be, they should grace your face
your lips, your hair
with my tips, with my lips
am i giving up. i guess i am
i'll still admire her through the corner of my eye
with no one to notice but I
the beauty of her eyes, the sense of comfort in her outfit
the uncomfort in her look
i am the pusillanimous, i am the unheardof
i am a boy, i am a dreamer
i am no hero, i am no emo
i write to tell you what,
i shake my fist in fear of fights,
i grin in sight of your delight
i am james nicasio
not the writer, not the drawer,
but the boy with a heart
|
|
| love |
[Tuesday,
December 21st, 2004] |
| [ |
mood |
| |
 hopeful |
] |
| [ |
music |
| |
damien rice- volcano |
] |
my hands stuck out
palms foward and fingers erect
im shaking my head as to back away
left foot back, right foot following
im not looking at you
oh how i'm happy not to look at you
tonight tonight was fine
not you to remember the dine
i was hurt a lot today
finally not by hearts but by pain
physical pain, how i actually yearned for thee
not any carves, but fun pain
with friends
its "line line line line line"
now I'm falling asleep
you guys are nice together, sounds fun
you'll never know how fun i am
i could right lines and lines of thoughts with of hearts
but this is nice
george said to me this fine dark morning
remember she can't fall for you if you're not there to catch her
he also said shed think im crazy
rawr rawr cacccooo
look at me play this guitar
black in hand, orange in tips
wiggle as i shake my hips
on and on this reads
i can't stop with my creeds
i starve for a little kiss
on the cheek, on the lips
tomorrow won't be fun
tomorrow will be amazing
i can't decide
oh this is noteworthy
at the store wher i felt most uncomfortable
is where the kiss was no where to be found
many "cool" kids claim to love the place
as do i
nope, no kiss book where i once showed you
nope nope nope nope
now heres my departure
thank you normandie
i will live love as love lives
|
|
| today is. |
[Sunday,
December 19th, 2004] |
|
today is. november 13 was the greatest, day i've ever had. kiss kiss kiss.
|
|
| just fine |
[Wednesday,
December 15th, 2004] |
| [ |
mood |
| |
 guilty |
] |
| [ |
music |
| |
modest mouse- gravity rides everything |
] |
my words. hears my "update journal". i wrote this earlier but it was erased. my heart and arms are filled with ache as i smash my fist in this desk. whichever, i decided to write it again despite the time and effort and feeling that was in my previous one.
i love the inevitable. i lied. the inevitable is similar to fate, which i have no belief in. this is due to my belief in love which changes fate. garden state. garden state has changed my view on love, on life, and i thank thee. i love its perception on love. oh no, here's this boys idea on love. it's over and over. he hasn't even felt love. how can he have so many theories, hypthothesies, ideas, perceptions, and advice on it. actually, he has rarely shown advice as it should be. whichever, i am proud to. i have my hopes of what i think love. its as i want it to be. she'd need no money. he'd need no other. they'd need each other. i am still the boy, but what he thinks the girl to fit the profile. is she worth the second glance? the masses have put their thought into it, and 4 dentists say no. the epitomy of "emo", as some haters would put it, even says no. i defy them. i say she is. her character fits that girl so much i choose not to lose. i lost. i choose not to. i defy my outcome and will fight my good fight. it may never be enough but my best brings your worst. it did, and you apologized. so many feelings come out of a simple organ. i only need her arms crossed my back with her forehead upon mine. yes thats hollywood. and yes, hollywood wishes it had the thoughts of reality i choose to be possible. with my dream i could die. it too hard of a dream but it is one of mine. i care not what you masses think of me. oh no, this boy is not cool for he wrote what shouldn't be thought. he should be tough guy, seem not to care, and act as he should be adored by his opposite sexes. i care not no more. i am a manly man. i fart spit and burp when i want. i am me. i have clear thoughts, hazy views, and hopeful hopes. liberate me from my time of hardships. i need it no more. i tied a knot. i shy as no one knows. i assume as i am the only one. i choose to postpone as my heart heavies, as my thoughts play my head. garden state colored my screen, as i laid with first minute of morning lays my window. as this picture concludes my screen,i sit and contemplate the next minutes. next hours. it was a good nite. im glad to've had it. for months, the scientist has tried to explain my thoughts of love. he exclaims, "you don't know how lovely you are" i say, i do know the traits she acquires. he states "nobody said it was easy, no one said it would be this hard" i agree with a light nod. i finally feel what he states. its definitely difficult, with no water to gasp my breath. he conludes, "aw lets just go back to the start" oh how i wish. oh how i wish. i hope. i verb. pronoun verb. conlusion- i am a boy, i have thoughts of leery, of hollywoods stereotype films, of songs that joy my stereo, and of hopes of my life to be.i am sorry for her problems. yes, id run through the president's airport, drops bags, and kiss you.i will not run from this world. love. i care more for the girl than as do i which scares the little boy.
|
|
| last |
[Tuesday,
December 7th, 2004] |
james "you're a star, in nobody's eyes but mine
Current mood: contemplative
has anyone caught the perception of reality. is it emotions? is it life or death? is it the need to please others? is it the need for popularity? is it the need for love? hm. we'll is it better to leave these questions unanswered for the sake of sanity and live life as "normal" as possible? just think of what you're going to do in 20 minutes. whatever, don't read this. you're last chance is too late. i've closed my eager eyes to see it. i use to many cliche lines. don't you think? forget what they say, forget what my head says. have i lost contact with reality? is it still with me? oh i hope so. you've been away for a long time. believe me this is the last time. ha. it's so old but honestly, worth hanging on to.
|
|
| jabberwalky is its title |
[Thursday,
December 2nd, 2004] |
| [ |
mood |
| |
 indescribable |
] |
Sunday, November 28, 2004
jabberwalky
Current mood: contemplative
walk. im scared. brrrr. this is me cold. this is me sick. this is me contemplative- look it says that I am under my current mood. this is me rocking out. I want to live a dream. my dreams. i have a dream. not as big as sir martin luther king jr's, but one that will make me a better man. this better man comes with this lady. she is cute. she is lovely. she's fashionable. she's funny. she's spontaneous. she's into music. she's into hair. she's into shows. she's into another.
boy oh boy, here it comes, another crying STORY! walk walk walk walk, head down, stare at the floor, head hurts, you bet. throat hurting, like my heart. its just another, show, im here to entertain this crowd with this guitar. I'm only interested in impressing one. look at me shake my hips. WE SHAKED HIPS. that was SO FUN, songs- SEDATED, DANCING WITH MYSELF, SO MUCH MORE! i think we should dance again.. it's my favorite dancing with you.
|
|
| myspace is getting full |
[Tuesday,
November 30th, 2004] |
| [ |
mood |
| |
 sick |
] |
Current mood: sick
hears something.
im used up too. i really wanted to do something tonight. so bad. too bad. not bad. i'm hear, i am solely. i've got something for you, it'll show you. too many first person pronouns i say! i've listened to this song over and over remembering communication dancing over house to house. we weren't even in the same room and you made me have fun. you're amazing. you're cute. you're funny. you make me feel uncomfortable, but you make me feel most comfortable. every moment is a thought with the presence of yours. last felt under your rule, i want to be the one to initiate things. I WANT! i didn't last eve because i was unsure of your feelings and of your friends.! this is public! i like le tealgre.
|
|
| oh this was a night to remember |
[Sunday,
November 28th, 2004] |
| [ |
mood |
| |
crushed |
] |
i only imagined it in my head. it happened. i've read it. he's said it. I hope you see. I'll wait. i've made it. jabberfuckingwalky verbiage. try to figure out what this is about. YOU DONT KNOW. its all nonsense.Let me explain
1. I've only imagined it in my head- imagine you two having the day i dreamed
2. it happened- you two happened
3. ive reead it- he wrote about it in his livejournal
4. he's said it- HE WROTE IT
5. I hope you see- see why I'm me
6. I'll wait- i sat here and waited for my time
7. ive made it- i finished your present
8. jabberfuckingwalky verbiage- jabberwalky (a poem that doesn't make sense but sounds like it does) verbiage- (too wordy) fucking- adjective
|
|
| myspace entries |
[Saturday,
November 27th, 2004] |
| [ |
mood |
| |
 contemplative |
] |
Monday, August 30, 2004
whats rye?
hey, hookers are for talking with, not doingg
Wednesday, September 15, 2004
Today, I had a memory
Today a boy dropped a flower when he saw his Juliet fuck anyone
Thursday, October 7, 2004
nobody said it was hard
illl dressed to kill them. They wonder why my clothing is my choice? oh for it is for love till death do we part. I always pass her fortress but she never lays her hair. she sees me and runs,? no shes chances and kisses me till it hurrts. pain is her bestt flaw. ooooooooooo0000000000000000ooo ooo ooo. let me walk backwards till the daysss we grin. smile my sweet
Thursday, November 18, 2004
jewelry
a heart is an organ. an organs are to be played loud to the heavens. to make the children dance with their ladies with hand in hand and hugged tight. they love the company of theirs. their memories are made when they rest their forehead upon the other, grin and look up to the other. they know thats where they want to be. she forgets her pains, he realizes his treasure. they write about what they want to get out. because now more than ever they are with their hearts, feeling feelings. they think about every ifs, which is what the head controls. hearts are always to be followed. hearts look for the now, what it holds. stay near, stay close. my hopes are way to high, but this is about the young boy and his lady. lonely boys are what makes songs. girlie girls are what makes kiis fm. smile my sweet. i try to fix you up when there isn't anything to be done, just the grace of touching your face. i am hardcore! grrrawr. if you like it, tell me, if you don't, ill rip your shoes off!
|
|
| today |
[Thursday,
November 25th, 2004] |
| [ |
mood |
| |
her |
] |
| [ |
music |
| |
red wedding- the bled |
] |
i will still feel for HER. I do FEEL for her. think? thought. at this moment, i haven't mourned for my loss, but yearned for my wants.
|
|
| it started out with a kiss, how did it end up like this |
[Sunday,
November 21st, 2004] |
| [ |
mood |
| |
 thirsty |
] |
| [ |
music |
| |
HAHA deceptacon- le tigre HAHA |
] |
i am dedicating today to write a song. to draw a picture. to take a photo. to dance. to play. to do things i want to today. today is a day to take. I NEVER I NEVER I NEVEREVER
|
|
| you lied today |
[Sunday,
November 21st, 2004] |
| [ |
mood |
| |
crushed |
] |
| [ |
music |
| |
mr. brightside- the killers |
] |
hears something.
im used up too. i really wanted to do something tonight. so bad. too bad. not bad. i'm hear, i am solely. i've got something for you, it'll show you. too many first person pronouns i say! i've listened to this song over and over remembering communication dancing over house to house. we weren't even in the same room and you made me have fun. you're amazing. you're cute. you're funny. you make me feel uncomfortable, but you make me feel most comfortable. every moment is a thought with the presence of yours. last felt under your rule, i want to be the one to initiate things. I WANT! i didn't last eve because i was unsure of your feelings and of your friends.! this is public! i like le tealgre..im the hero, not the emo ............................... this was the end of this posting but hears more. this is honest and straight. NOT ARTSY TO SEEM INTELLECTUAL, MAYBE THIS HOW I WRITE AND I DONT GIVE A FUCK WHAT YOU THINK- you told me that you couldn't meet me today. you specifically used the word COULDN'T. it would have been ok if you used "DIDN'T WANT TO" but you lied to me. because you either just wanted to hang out with your friends today, or you didn't want to see me two days in a row, or you just don't want to see me anymore, or you're just done using me or whatnot. i saw you today where the lights shine and the green light up main. you were wearing a white jacket, and the cutest smile. you couldn't imagine how excrutiating it felt, but i still noticed you're lovelyness. it didn't or it couldn't be helped. as if my day didn't feel sad, you topped the cake. new and close friends have advised me "watch out for her" or, "stay as far away as possible from her", or whatever. i dont know what to do until i hear you. She is this, she is that. i did not listen because i have true, honest courting feelings for you. how could i be so foolish. john- "i too play the guitar, sometimes the fool" i honestly still have these feelings. i don't want to lie to myself, i am a dreamer, and i'm proud to have hope. many say its a silly trait, but i aquire it and im glad to. i do give second chances, i do forgive, i do act vulnerable, i do what i am. i hope that you can show me a memory. since the first time i met you, i was intrigued from the start. it's amazing how in awe i was when i first saw you, i needed to see you again. your fashion, your hair, your big glasses, your shoes, you. i do think you are still cute, still funny, still lovely, still amazing, still.. you wouldn't believe of how much thought i had put into this night until your incident. hey, i honestly still like you, but i would want to talk...........................................................
|
|
| on AND on |
[Monday,
November 8th, 2004] |
| [ |
mood |
| |
crushed |
] |
I'll wait here forever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever a
|
|
| remember |
[Sunday,
November 7th, 2004] |
| [ |
mood |
| |
contemplative |
] |
At times I am fine, but not tonight
I got ready early today.. I've planned this out for decades. I got the information that I needed to carry out my plan. To accomplish what I wanted to get done, I made 38 lies. I walked to my transportation. I waited in a bad neighbor hood for my 78. It took many moments and paragraphs as I read "cry, my beloved country." Many tricks played in my head. Many possible outcomes played out through my head. My 78 arrived. I did many honorable deeds today in order to get karma, or superstition behind my head. The old lady, the driver, and a boy as the age of 60 helped me find my destination. It took maybe sixty minutes? or one hundred- probably one hundred. I took a deep breath, fixed my face and shirt, took an orange flower, and headed to the direction of hell. I was told her house to be 5th on right, so I counted slowly, only to prolong the unevitable. As I believed i found it, i acted as i didn't find it so she'll find me. I called, suprised her, and made her dress, that ________-"word" willy uses about his misses. I saw her 20 yards away. I waved and walked the longest walk of my life to her. I said, I got you this-handed her the flower. We had conversation. I said some fake and rediculous reason of why I was over her territory. It ended without me comprehending or knowing when it did. I needed to hear her voice, so I made some excuse to call her.. Oh was her voice nice, but the conversation seemed to lessen my hopes of my goal. I returned to my bus stop. I truely understood what was really in front of me. OH did I want her. I wish she would. Mad at fact of what happened, and really wanting to see her again, i decided to see her once more. Movies say hero gets the girl. I picked a purple flower, and kept telling myself of what I will say. I returned to what I thought her house was. I first picked up 5 rocks, and threw them at what i thought was her window, which of course i was wrong. I got more rocks, and threw them at the window across as the same window i began with. Giving up, i called her once more and asked to see her again. She wasn't thrilled, but I believe it was how she always acted. I gave her my second flower, and said what I repeated in my mind. "I know that you don't like me, but do you think we will still be friends?" She changed the subject with some other stupid matter about her neighbor. I reinstated what I said. She says, "you're making me embarrased", without the tone of intention of making me hurt, just of the fact of putting her on the spot. It was needed. I said, "Don't worry, I am the one who is embarrased." I stook out my hand and repeated it with some slightly changed words and she said we are already friends. I said softly, without too much intention of her hearing, "I mean after this." She said yes and we shook hands, the smallest and most form of physical contact between two. It ended. I went back to my bus stop, sad and angry. I tried to continue reading my book, very hard. I even slammed my hand against the bus stop fence a couple of times out of frustration. I took the longest and worst bus ride home. I preoccupied the rest of my day with unimportant events. I felt nothing for the past 10 hours. I returned home cutting my arm, not my life. I inscripted one of my beliefs for not too much of a reason. It made me forget evenmore, which was amazing. My friends consoled me, especially one who shared his insight and his situation, but might be mad that I believe in pride and love. Another who said what I did was lovely, and says that the girl will realize what she lost. I honestly believe that if she will ever end up feeling as I do now, I will give her that chance. I like you Anna Marie, but you made me write this and I think there are other girls that I'm better suited with, but I like you.......
2:56 AM - 5 Comments - 0 Props - Add Comment - Edit - Remove
...:::♥ Lorraine ♥:::...
aww jamesy! don't worry, shes stupid and you don't deserve what she gave you. Your a very sweet young man, and one sweet girl will soon realize that...you did nothing wrong.
Posted by ...:::♥ Lorraine ♥:::... on Tuesday, September 07, 2004 at 9:49 PM - Remove
Motor Maggot♥
DARLING!
YOU DESERVE MUCH BETTER!
YR TO SWEET FOR THAT JUNK.
Posted by Motor Maggot♥ on Monday, September 06, 2004 at 11:05 PM - Remove
+/ - (positive/negative)
pride is a silly trait.....now love....love is for the foolish. but foolishness and bravery are one and the same as far as i'm concerned and James is definately the latter. Anna Marie Louise Harlot Jezebel i don't care for your name. your actions are a much better description.
Posted by +/ - (positive/negative) on Monday, September 06, 2004 at 11:03 PM - Remove
william
dear shallow ________ ... james is to good for your and if you cant see that you dont deserve him how many guys take two busses walk on foot and pick you flowers you messed up sincerly me
Posted by william on Monday, September 06, 2004 at 8:01 PM - Remove
justin
fuck you anna marie. look at what you've done. fix it.
Posted by justin on Monday, September 06, 2004 at 11:47 AM - Remove
|
|
| imnotholdingback |
[Sunday,
November 7th, 2004] |
| [ |
mood |
| |
crushed |
] |
| [ |
music |
| |
Between us and them- moving units |
] |
my first honestlly. it was only a kiss, but it meant the world to me. I feel for you as you feel for him. I am honest, i really don't know you. I'd love to though. if you'd let me. today you didn't. it's ok, another weekend that was wasted. Till next weekend. I'll keep writing though as if I'm in war.
Dear,
This letter will not be last. I wish you are having fun and smiling wherever you are, even though it isn't including me. I was so looking forward to today. I just had to make it art. Picture is almost done. You might now like it, but its to you to change the picture. I hope this doesn't make you feel uncomfortable. my fingers are trembling right now. I don't know where you are right now, but if you would, we could dance all night as in dreams, as in movies, as in fridays. I'll not wait here, but i'll be patient. i will win my princess. give up iss what my head tells me, but he's a liar. I only trust my heart.
Love always,
Jacque Copperfield.
heart is my favorite organ
|
|
| i dont know what to do right now |
[Saturday,
November 6th, 2004] |
|
i dont know what to do right now. I don't know what to do right now. I don't know what to do right now. I don't know what to do right now. I don't know what to do right now. I don't know what to do right now. I dont' know what to do right know. Idon'tknoealjksdal;f dfl;jad> F
|
|
| navigation |
| [ |
viewing |
| |
most recent entries |
] |
| [ |
go |
| |
earlier |
] |
|
|
|
|
![[info]](http://l-stat.livejournal.com/img/userinfo.gif){kind=small}
xmr_brightsidex's journal